overthinking is my jam

New boss starts at work today. An actual for-real thought that I had this morning:

'Which of these t-shirts sends the appropriate message? Looking for something that says: I knew you were coming but couldn't be bothered to dress like a professional grown-up adult, yet I still reserve the right to engage in office gossip about you.'

(Reality: New boss will probably be in orientation all day and may or may not make an appearance in our building.)