marcicat | pretty sure I'd know

One of my coworkers is Always Contrary. If someone says, "Looks sunny outside," they say, "It's supposed to rain later." If someone says, "This meeting is running long," they say, "It's short compared to what we've covered." They will contradict anyone, anytime, including themselves. Sometimes leading to hilarity.

AC, yesterday: "Oh, you got your ears lowered!" (haha, yes, very funny)
Me: "No, I think my hair's just sticking up funny today and makes it look that way."

AC: "No, that's not it. It's shorter!"
Me: "Well, the last time I cut it was in August."

AC, visibly gearing up to fight me on this: "It's definitely shorter than it was on Friday."
Me, making a note to complain to the internet later: "I actually came over to ask a question."

The best part about this is that it gets more ridiculous the more you think about it. Does AC think I'm lying to them about the last time I cut my hair? Do they think I cut my hair over the weekend and just don't remember it? I was prepared for the somewhat passive-aggressive 'well, you've been on vacation a lot so I didn't notice,' tactic, but admittedly befuddled by the 'blatant denial' tactic.

Anyway, that's work!